DEATHWISH

PART ONE

Abby Walzynski and James Lampore had a troubled relationship.

It wasn't for lack of love that it was troubled. They loved each other deeply.

Probably more so than most couples, in fact. But like Romeo and Juliet, they came from different worlds.

Not as different as one might think but different. They had their reasons, their secrets; theirs was a secret love, one that few could know about for fear that harm could come to both of them.

It was one of those days when they could meet up and have their privacy.

They didn't get to spend much quality time due to the nature of their relationship, but today was different. They had each other for a few solid hours. At Abby's suggestion, James disconnected the phone so there would be no interruptions.

This was an unusual request, but he did it anyway. He would have done stranger things if he was asked by Abby. In fact, he did on several occassions.


When Abby arrived, it was a little past four pm.

They lay next to each other and talked for awhile. Often they'd look into each other's eyes, and both of them were considerably grateful for this time together (and any time together).

As they talked, an hour had past.

They talked about serious things like their relationships, Abby's son, money, work, and other similar subjects.

They also joked around a lot and they were all smiles and laughter.

Abby looked at James directly in the eyes and said, "Bitch." James kissed her neck. She pressed, "Are you my bitch?"

He laughed and said, "Always for you."


She smiled and looked away for a moment.

She said that they were going to play a game in a little while so she took out a piece of paper and told him to write on it. "What should I write?" he asked. She smiled and said, "Write 'I DID THIS' in all capital letters."

He did. He asked when they would start the game, but instead of answering him, Abby began kissing his neck.

 James felt somewhat aroused so he kissed back gently.

They kissed so softly...there was so much passion. She began to reach down, and touched his penis.

It was moderately erect, so he pulled off his pants and clothes.

She pulled down her pants too, and they continued to kiss.

Once they were unclothed, they had hand to hand sex for awhile before James thrust himself inside of her.


They made love only for a few minutes before James came.

As his heavy breath came out, he lay beside Abby. After a few moments, they began to talk again. It was sweet talk. "I love you", "I love you so much," "You're beautiful", the whole gambit.

Abby held James close and tight. His head lay on her breast, and their legs intertwined.


Her arms were around him. His forehead set against her soft cheek and before long, small beads of perspiration formed where their flesh met.

She knew he was comfortable. Before long, he fell asleep. As she lay next to him, she felt a vast array of mixed emotions: deep love, guilt, remorse, pain, joy, and other things that didn't make sense together.

She prayed a silent prayer that God would forgive him in the next life...and that God would forgive her as well.

She moved slowly away from him as to not wake him. As she slid out from under him, he stirred a bit but didn't wake.

She looked down at him sleeping peacefully. He was so happy. Everything he ever wanted just happened to him before he gave into sleep.

And as he slept, there was a small smirk on his face. He looked so peaceful, so happy.

She went over to her black purse and pulled out two latex gloves.

She put them on and then grabbed a gun from her purse.

She put the gun directly to his heart and pulled the trigger. He died instantly.

There was no pain. In fact, there was still a small smirk on his face as he lay there dead.

She took the note from the dresser top; the note was in his handwriting, "I DID THIS." She lay the note next to him and placed the gun in his hand.

A tear slid down her eye as she looked at him this one last time.


She sobbed and said, "I love you, my lovely baby boy."

Tears streamed down her face, and it was as if she couldn't look away.

"I'll see you soon," she said, "Now you're free. Now we're free."

She finally walked away, walked downstairs into her car and drove away. She was his Heaven, and she gave herself to him so that he could die wrapped in Heaven's arms.


PART TWO

As Abby drove off, she had wiped away the tears that fell gracefully to her lips, and she licked the saltiness away.

She tried to make sense of everything that just happened, but she could not. He was her Heaven and she was now lost.

Emotions burst from her like a morning sunrise, as she drove around aimlessly and sobbed.

At one point, she gained composure, long enough to go purchase a bottle of Gin.

She proceeded to get into the car, ripped the bag open, and unscrewed the top. She drank down her predatory ways with a half a bottle of Gin. She twisted the top back on and sped off-- all the while cursing God for love lost.


Abby thought she would drive to James' favorite place, down by the river.

She stumbled as she got out of the car, and walked nearly a mile before coming to rest on a big flat boulder near the shoreline. Through all the tears, she managed to pull out a joint that she had been saving for James.

Before she lit it up, she said a silent prayer to herself. Then she looked to the Heavens and said..."I'll be with you soon, my love!"


She unscrewed the cap to the Gin bottle and set it in the sand; she lit the joint, and between the tears shed, she hit it...hit it...hit it, again.

She grabbed the bottle and drank down the rest, crying all the while. It was almost gone, just enough for one more swallow, but she was saving it for something.


She reached into her purse, and pulled out a bottle of 90 Valium;

she swallowed them with the last inch of Gin that was left in the bottle.


She laid next to the water on her back, and looked up into the blurry blue sky... "I'm coming, my love... I'll be with you soon..."


Before long, she fell asleep to be with him. Never to awake again.
 

Text by O.M.E.G.A. and his erstwhile paramour.